What Caring Actually Costs
They tell you caring rewarding. And it is - on a good day.
But nobody talks about the other days.
The days where you wake up already behind.
Where your body aches in ways it didn’t five years ago.
Where you snap at someone you love and then lie awake at 2am wondering what’s happening to you.
Nobody talks about the guilt. The feelings of resentment toward the people you’d do anything for. Or the other guilt of wanting something - anything - that’s just for you.
And nobody talks about how lonely it gets. How you can be surrounded by people who need you and still feel completely invisible.
If any of that sounds familiar... you’re in the right place.
Does this sound familiar?
You’re exhausted from caring, but feel guilty when you rest.
You’re running on empty, but the more you give, the more is expected.
You know you need boundaries, but setting them feels impossible - or selfish.
You’re feeling irritable, numb or disconnected from the person you used to be.
You’re stretched to breaking point, and there’s nothing left for yourself.
Your body’s feeling it too - tension, exhaustion, getting sick more often.
You’re desperate for support that reflects your reality - not more generic self-care advice.
If any of this resonates, you are not alone.
Over 70% of carers have experienced burnout - and it’s not your fault.
When Candles, Baths and Massages Just Won’t Cut It
Most self-care advice wasn’t built for carers.
It doesn’t account for the guilt. The relentless demands. The reality that you have no spare time - and that what little energy you do have goes straight to someone else.
This program is different.
You’ll learn Radical Self-Care - practical, evidence-based strategies that fit into your real life. Not the life you wish you had. The one you’re actually living.
Strategies that help you prevent burnout or recover from it, so you can continue caring in a healthy, sustainable way - without losing yourself in the process.
Meet Tess Howells - Psychologist, Author & Training Consultant
I’m Tess. And I didn't see burnout or PTSD coming either.
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I spent 20 years as a psychologist helping carers in some of the most remote parts of Australia. Flying doctor service. Aboriginal health communities. Corporate mental health. I thought I understood burnout.
Then in 2020, I collapsed under the weight of my own.
What followed was four years of recovery and research - pulling apart everything I thought I knew about why carers burn out and rebuilding it into something that actually works.
Not just for health professionals. Not just for family carers. And not just in theory. In real life. In your life.
If you're someone whose role in life is to look after other people at the expense of themselves, this program is for you.
It's all this knowledge put together so you can learn how to take care of yourself properly, even when times feel tough.
"I believe this is a critical time in history – a time for women to be seen, heard and proud, boldly claiming and celebrating their different yet equally valuable way of being in the world"
Inside the course you'll learn how to:
Recognise signs of stress before they become burnout... and prevent them
Notice - and interrupt - fatigue patterns before they take hold
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Discover how to set boundaries without the guilt (yes, really!)
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Understand how prolonged stress affects your body - and what you can do about it
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Master practical techniques to soothe your nervous system
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Set small goals to move forward and better meet your own needs
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Value yourself, honour your emotions and reconnect with why you became a care
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Feel seen, heard, understood and validated
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Find your way back to sustainable, healthy caregiving
What Makes This Program Different From Everything Else Out There?
Designed specifically for carers.
Not adapted from a general wellness program. Built from the ground up for the unique pressures you face — whether you’re a paid health worker, a family carer, or both.
Addresses the stress and systemic pressures you face every day.
This isn’t about “thinking positive.” It’s about understanding the multiple layers of stress that impact your caregiving — personal, professional, cultural and systemic — and what to do about each one.
Teaches micro-tools that fit into busy lives.
You don’t need an hour of meditation. You need something you can do in three minutes between shifts, or while the kettle boils, or in the car before you walk through the door.
Grounded in positive psychology and real-life scenarios.
A supportive, compassionate approach based on the science of human flourishing — not dysfunction. Because there’s nothing wrong with you. The system you’re caring in was never designed to care for you back.
Delivered in simple, practical language.
Short, easy-to-follow sessions you can complete at your own pace. No jargon. No overwhelm. Just clear, useful guidance from someone who gets it.
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Discover the Carer Fatigue and Burnout Online Course
When Candles, Baths and Massages Just Won't Cut it!
I created this comprehensive whole person approach for service workers and carers, especially those in rural areas, who may struggle to find the resources, strategies and support they need at this time.
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You'll discover proven techniques, strategies and insights for Radical Self-Care and Recovery gained from over 4 years of research and over 20+ years as a psychologist & training consultant.
What Others Are Saying
"Tess is so easy to listen to and has so much personal knowledge."
"It felt like what I am feeling as a carer has been validated."
About Tess
Tess is a registered psychologist, training consultant and author, who has lived and worked much of her life in rural Australia and who has a strong commitment to assisting rural communities to receive the support and resources they need.
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Her diverse experience includes owning a multi-disciplinary complementary medicine clinic, working for the Royal Flying Doctor Service, working offshore and in remote areas for the International Health and Medical Service, delivering clinical service to several Aboriginal Health organisations and providing psycho-social health training to corporates, community and not-for-profit organisations.​​
Thrive Positive Psychology
ABN 83 211 965 279
A Whole Person Approach for Health and Community Services Workers and Carers
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Contact Us
PO Box 15
Narrawong VIC 3285
Victoria, Australia.
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Email: tess ['@'] thrivepositivespychology.com.au
