What is Radical Self-Care?

Radical Self-Care is a framework that places our caring roles within societal and cultural contexts and unapologetically prioritises the carer’s own wellbeing as an essential, non-negotiable prerequisite to doing caring work sustainably. 

It acknowledges the multiple levels of stress that carers face - not only from personal caregiving situations, but from relationships, environmental impacts, cultural, societal and even spiritual contexts - and provides a set of guiding principles for protecting yourself while you continue to care for others.

“Our culture too often subordinates felt knowledge to the intellect.”

- Gabor Maté, The Myth of Normal

The invisible burden of caregiving

In our caring roles, we are often exposed to suffering that is a direct result of inequality, discrimination or indifference.

And as a result, many of us can find ourselves thrust into roles that require us to advocate for socio-political reform - on top of providing our usual carer roles to our clients or family members.

It’s a role many of us never expected, nor wanted, but have come to understand is essential in accessing the best support and care for those we love or work with.

Navigating government, non-government and community agencies - each with their own differing criteria, changing personnel and shifting eligibility rules - can be an absolute nightmare, particularly when a critical response is needed urgently. 

And advocating for those we care about with multiple agencies, who all too often seem not to care nor understand our needs, or at the very least not seem to understand our urgency, places a significant burden on our own stress management efforts.

A Radical Self-Care approach acknowledges this vital and often invisible dimension of caregiving - and the very real impact it can have on your own mental health and wellbeing.

Multiple Levels of Stress

Radical Self-Care acknowledges what I call the Multiple Levels of Stress - stress not only from our personal caregiving situations, but stress also from relationships, environmental impacts, cultural, societal and even spiritual contexts.

It places our caring roles within those broader contexts, and recognises the full weight of what carers carry.

The Fundamentals of Radical Self-Care

• It places our caring roles within societal and cultural contexts. Radical Self-Care acknowledges the impact of patriarchy, discrimination, inequality and the double burden carried by many women - including the devaluing of women’s work, and the prioritising of intellect (head - male energy) over emotions (heart - female energy).

• It radically and unapologetically prioritises your own wellbeing as an essential, non-negotiable prerequisite to doing caring work sustainably. Think of the mask on the airplane - you cannot care for others if you are depleted.

“Never give from the depths of your well, but from the overflow.”  - Rumi

• It calls for extreme boundary management and seeks balance between our caring roles and our requirement for rest and recovery time.

• It encourages the radical selection of friends and supporters and network members - to avoid energy vampires and to identify energy enhancers.

• It prioritises commitment to proactive physical, mental and emotional health maintenance routines.

• It encourages radical self-awareness of your personal history, your vulnerabilities and woundings, your triggers and your needs - as well as your inherent strengths.

• It radically chooses your safety, your body, your heart - over your mind. When your mind says yes but your heart and body say no, or when others are pressuring you, ask yourself: “Can I do this with a full heart?” If the answer is no, don’t agree to it.

• It supports radical acceptance that you aren’t perfect, won’t please everyone, and can’t do everything.

• It supports us to stay radically and persistently connected to the positive aspects and joys of our caring roles and natures.

• It helps us to radically support other carers - especially women - to value ourselves, the vital work of our caring roles and natures, and the importance of illuminating uniquely feminine, heart-centred approaches as a counter-balance to dominant male/head approaches, for the greater good of humanity.

Frequently Asked Questions

How is Radical Self-Care different from regular self-care?

Traditional self-care tends to focus on individual habits and relaxation - things like exercise, rest and mindfulness. Radical Self-Care goes further. It places your caring role within broader societal and cultural contexts, acknowledges the impact of systemic issues like inequality and discrimination on your wellbeing, and treats your own health as a non-negotiable prerequisite to sustainable caregiving - not a reward for getting through it.

Who is Radical Self-Care for?

Radical Self-Care is designed for anyone in a caring role - whether you’re a professional carer, a family member looking after a loved one with a disability, illness or mental health condition, or someone who finds themselves advocating on behalf of others within complex systems. It is particularly relevant for women, who disproportionately carry the burden of unpaid and undervalued caregiving work.

What are the Multiple Levels of Stress?

The Multiple Levels of Stress is a concept that recognises carers experience stress not only from their personal caregiving situations, but also from relationships, environmental impacts, cultural pressures, societal expectations and even spiritual contexts. Radical Self-Care acknowledges all of these layers - rather than treating carer stress as a single, isolated issue.

What are the core principles of Radical Self-Care?

The framework is built around ten fundamentals. These include placing caring roles within societal and cultural contexts, unapologetically prioritising your own wellbeing, practising extreme boundary management, radically selecting your support network, committing to proactive health maintenance, cultivating deep self-awareness, choosing your body and heart over your mind when they’re in conflict, practising radical acceptance, staying connected to the joy in your caring role, and supporting other carers - especially women - to value themselves and their work.

Where can I learn more about Radical Self-Care?

For more information about Radical Self-Care and how to support yourself in your caregiving role, visit www.thrivepositivepsychology.com.au or Tess' Facebook page, or sign up for Tess' Carer Fatigue & Burnout course at thrivepositivepsychology.thinkific.com